ADHD

Now Playing:Quelqu'un M'a Dit from 500 Days of Summer Soundtrack (Umm.. no I don't speak french) Its really pretty thooo!!

Ive started writing like 3 blogs today. But theyre all topics that I want to articulate properly, so being as I mayyy have ADHD and I'm too lazy to write anything GOOD I think I will save them for another day. Maybe one day at work or something.
Lets just talk about today shall we?

My religion class was so intense and awesome today, I freaking LOVE my major. My mind gets blowwwn every tuesday and thursday, by the beautiful Julia Fogg, who is an ordained presbyterian pastor who studies a lot of inter-religion beliefs and might want to become muslim. HAHA! She's really cool.
Studying religion is so mind-opening. I learn so much every day. And I always thought I knew a ton about this stuff, but this is no sunday school class! Other Gospels, the beloved disciple, wrong translations, things the church loves to over-look, crazy stuff dude seriously. Succch a good class.

What else did I even do today? Ummm.. Oh I hung out with Shelby at the hospital again which is our home away from home these days! But its comfy, I dont really mind. It was nice to just hang out with her too, its been a while sense we've had one-on-one time and it was really good. And she's doing better and better! She should be out by this weekend!!
I adore her =)

So logistically I guess, that was my day.
Today was one of those weird homesick days though. I hate being homesick, especially because I never evvvver ever got homesick ever until I moved to college. Even when I was little, being away from home never bothered me.
But Im homesick here. And I still feel like a visitor sometimes. At my school, at work, even in the dorms sometimes. This isn't really "home." Bakersfield is home. And it's actually the first place I've ever dubbed that before too. I miss HOME.

I miss my bed, and my down comforter (Im not sure why it's not here with me, I should re-think that). I miss my little brother who refuses to have a phone conversation with me (teenagers, ugh). I miss homemade meals. I miss my dad's "it'll work out" kind of encouragement. I miss my mom's hugs. I miss my dog and her loud snoring and her annoying barking! I miss driving past my high school. I miss the retirement home that I waitress at. I miss being inspired to write and to make things and to play music. I miss how excited everyone gets when the sky is blue. And I miss my friiiiiends. Seriously. Serrriously seriously.

I've been really blessed throughout my life in that Ive always had a really good community of friends. I still keep in touch with girls I knew in elementary school who live 2000 miles away. And my group from home, ahhh, I can't even tell you how wonderful each of them are!! =)
In junior high I met my best friend, Alyssa. This is the girl that God seriously designated to be my best friend. And I'm hers. She's quite literally saved me over and over again and I dont know where, or who, I would be without her. She knows me and she gets me and she is always always there, encouraging and wonderful and loving <3
Then there's the choir girls =) My high school choir opened up about 99% of the doors to the best things in my life for me. I would have been so lost through high school without it.
I miss Sara (but I get to see her tomorrow YAY!!!!!) Sara's my best friend from high school =) She's sweet and funny and adorable and wonderful! She brings such a bright light into the lives of everyone who knows her, and I really can feel the absence of it when Im here for too long.
My friends are the most beautiful girls inside and out. I miss Melanie and Andrea and Paula and Monavie and Rachel and Theresa and Hannah and Michelle and Jennifer and Gina and Emily and Bree and Stevie!! Theyre so great I dont even CARE if I never make anymore friends, Im set, seriously.
Im so so blessed, but Ive been spoiled and now my heart really aches for them. Especially when I think about how long it's gonna be until I see some of them =/
And I miss the choir boys! And I miss the "cool asians"! And I miss the girls I worked with! And I really miss Kyle and Charles! And ASIAN!
And every every day, most of all, I miss Javier Valencia, who has stolen my heart and apparently my mind too! Long distance is hard, even if it's just two measly hours over a mountain range. Even if I get to see him once a week, that's not good enough for me. I want him all the time =/ all day every day.
But I guess it's okay we don't spend every second together, I wouldn't want this to fizzle out. Not that it could.
We were friends first. We know each other so well and we've been through so much together, and that is why this is gonna work. And I can't tell you how, but I know it's real. And the aching pain I feel from missing him everyday is only a small percentage of the evidence.
(Hahahahaaa, Im gonna write a whole blog about my transformation into "one of those girls" one of these days. Its very interesting to see actually.) Whatever I dont care about being cliche or corny, I love this kid, seriously. =)

So thaaat's how I feel today. Ive had quite a range of emotions today from revelation to loneliness to anger (it takes a lot for me to get angry too but I could have killed a bitch today, just for a second. just sayin)
Jedi dont get angry though because anger leads to the dark side, so I had to put it to rest. And now all is well.

Also I ate some chocolate covered strawberries today and that was awesome.

So I guess it was a good day. The best part about it though is that its now over and technically FRIDAY! Which is just the best =) This is gonna be a great weekend, I have a feeling.

Also, two months ago I went out to Mac Grill with Jav and we watched Inglorious Bastards after and Tropic Thunder, and I AM A VERY VERY HAPPY GIRL =D


Ok weird people who read this, GOODNIGHT,
Loove yoooou =))



(This is Alyssa and I at age 13, and dayyyyum do we look good, right?)
=D